Thursday, December 03, 2009

Tattooed Man Butt is Doing Crystal Meth with Vince Lombardi and Watching Avatar


Inside the Tattoo Circus: a journey through the modern world of tattoos by Kristian Misser. Tons of color photos illustrating the work of current artists, styles, themes, and more. The lady on the cover looks like author Christa Faust. I emailed Faust and told her that. I'm probably on her ignore list now.

Open: an autobiography by Andre Agassi and [unnamed ghost writer]. Champion tennis player Agassi had a really, really crappy father and hates tennis. So he started doing crystal meth and married a German.

That First Season: how Vince Lombardi took the worst team in the NFL and set it on the path to glory by John Eisenberg. This is Wisconsin, I am required to buy it. You know who else should buy this? The Buffalo Bills.

Avatar: a field guide to Pandora by Maria Wilhelm and Dirk Mathison. "A confidential report on the biological and social history of Pandora." This movie came from a comic book? A video game?

Super Freakonimcs: global cooling, patriotic prostitutes and why suicide bombers should buy life insurance by Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner. One of those hippies over at Madison Public wrote about this book and openly baited me in the blog title. Sometimes those hippies can be smart, because it worked.

What the Dog Saw: and other adventures by Malcolm Gladwell. Science or something.

Too Big to Fail: the inside story of how Wall Street and Washington fought to save the financial system - and themselves by Andrew Ross Sorkin. Take your blood pressure medication before you start reading.

Little Stevens Underground Garage Update

Little Steven Loves Locksley. Van Zandt likes to play songs by Locksley. I only mention this because Locksley started out in Madison.


Trial by Fire by J.A. Jance. Nun helps out hospital patient with amnesia. Patient's would be killer puts nun in his sights.

U is for Undertow by Sue Grafton. Add ingredients, shake, bake, let it cool.

Marion Zimmer Bradley's Sword of Avalon by Diana L. Paxson. Swords and stuff.

Southern Lights by Danielle Steel.

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

DVDs: Four Comedy, Five Action, and More Ray Liotta


Funny People starring Eric Bana. Bana started as a stand-up comedian in Australia until he played the lead in Chopper. This movie has something to do with a dying comedian.

Bruno starring Sacha Baron Cohen. Gay Austrian causes trouble. Remember the nude fight and chase scene in Borat? That was funny.

G.I. Joe: the rise of Cobra starring [embarrassed actors]. Soldiers use CGI to defeat "the mysterious and evil Cobra organization" and try and start a franchise.

Terminator: Salvation starring Batman. John Connor kills robots with a flattop AR.

The Line starring Ray Liotta and Andy Garcia. Hired killer with an AR is after a drug baron in Tijuana.

My Sister's Keeper with Cameron Diaz, Alec Baldwin. Organ harvesting.

Angels and Demons starring Tom Hanks, Obi-Wan Kenobi, That Swedish Dude. Religious intrigue and the Illuminati set amongst a huge Hollywood budget.

The Proposal starring Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds. I wonder if they made Reynolds take his shirt off like in all those swords and fists movies he is in.

You're Welcome America: a final night with George W. Bush starring Will Ferrell. Ferrell's stage show that will " shock and awe you into uncontrollable laughter."

Spy Kids 2 starring blahblahblah. The last copy broke.

Monday, November 30, 2009

11 DVDs: Ray Liotta, Space Creatures, Hairy Dudes, Whores


Futurama: Bender's Game starring [voices]. The Planet Express crew sneaks into a dark-matter mine for spaceship fuel and find some underground, medieval place.

X-Origins: Wolverine starring A Couple Australian Dudes. Guys with muscles fight.

Arthur Hailey's Detective starring Tom Berenger, Cybill Shepherd. Television movie from 2005 with Berenger as a priest turned cop who agrees to meet a serial killer on death row.

Killshot with Diane Lane, Mickey Rourke, Thomas Jane, Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Married couple witness murder and go into witness protection. Hitman comes after them. The novel by Elmore Leonard was real good.

Crank 2: High Voltage starring Jason Statham, Amy Smart. Gratuitous pistol posing on the DVD case.

State of Play with Russell Crowe, Ben Affleck, others. Journalist in D.C. discovers conspiracy while investigating the murder of a Senator's assistant.

Futurama: into the wild green yonder starring [the same voices]. Funny, animated adventures.

Winter of Frozen Dreams starring Thora Birch, Keith Carradine. Biochemistry student doubles as a prostitute and commits murder. Based on the Barbara Hoffman case in Madison. Link. Link.

Anvil: the story of Anvil starring {Anvil]. Canadian metal band refuses to give up.

Girlfriend Experience starring Sasha Grey. Manhattan prostitute offers the "girlfriend experience" with 'companionship and conversation' as if she were really the guy's loving girlfriend.

Observe and Report starring Ray Liotta, Seth Rogen, Anna Faris. Mall guard wants to catch flasher, get a job with the police department, and have sex with a cosmetics salesgirl.