Saturday, April 10, 2010

Pieces of Paper Bound Together with Glue and Thread


Wrecked by Carol Higgins Clark. This has a release date of 13 April. So you have to wait. I don't need to wait because I won't read it. "A Reagan Reilly mystery."

From the Grounds Up by Sandra Balzo. Another coffee shop mystery.

The Shadow of Your Smile by Mary Higgins Clark. Also releasing on April 13. Also not being read by me.

Shameless by Karen Robards. 13th. No read.

Bride Collector by Ted Dekker. Same as above.

Beatrice and Virgil by Yann Martin. Also 13 April but I might read it or listen to it.

Large Print

Deep Shadow by Randy Wayne White.

Mornings in Jenin by Susan Abulhawa. That's a tough one to type.

Mennonite in a Little Black Dress by Rhoda Janzen. I'm betting Mennonite women do not shave their legs so you better hope that hemline is low.

Out of Body by Stella Cameron.

Summer Hideaway by Susan Wiggs.


Fodor's Southern California, 2010. As if you're going to go surfing with the lanky model chicks on the cover.

Fodor's Toronto, 2010. As if you're going to hang out with the hipsters at their outdoor cafe.

Fodor's Northern California, 2010. As if you're going to take a winery tour into the vineyards rather than sit your lazy ass down in a tasting room and complain about the heat.

Fodor's California, 2009. As it your going to find any stretch of Highway 1 not crammed with cars as you toodle along in a red convertible.

Saylor's Lake Mills, 2010. As if you're going to do anything of interest this summer aside from march in the Town and Country Days parade and give push starts for Boy #2's bicycle. Did you even go swimming in the lake last year? Don't start to pretend you'll do the zombie shoot in MN.

Thursday, April 08, 2010

Mike-Squared, Dinosaurs, Sherlock Holmes, That Quilt Lady


Bizarre Dinosaurs by National Geographic. Dinosaurs that look bizarre. We have this in the kids section but I'd guess that kids will have to be at least 3rd grade unless you want to quickly bore them and have them trying to crush your head when all you want to do is sit on the couch and watch a show about bizarre dinosaurs.

Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans starring Nicolas Cage and Eva Mendes. "High-functioning addict who is a deeply intuitive, fearless detective reigning over the beautiful ruins of New Orleans with authority and abandon." Remember what Kinski said about Herzog?

Herzog is a miserable, hateful, malevolent, avaricious, money-hungry, nasty, sadistic, treacherous, cowardly creep...he should be thrown alive to the crocodiles! An anaconda should strangle him slowly! A poisonous spider should sting him and paralyze his lungs! The most venomous serpent should bite him and make his brain explode! No panther claws should rip open his throat--that would be much too good for him! Huge red ants should piss into his lying eyes and gobble up his balls and his guts! He should catch the plague! Syphilis! Yellow fever! Leprosy! It's no use; the more I wish him the most gruesome deaths, the more he haunts me.

That Kinski. What a card.

Sherlock Holmes with Robert Downey , Jr. and Jude Law. Holmes now updated with slow motion! And sexual innuendo! Crider liked this. But, consider the trailers of B-movie dreck he posts on his website.

An Education starring SomeGirl and SomeActorGuy. Teenage girl hooks up with older guy in '60s London.

AudioBook on CD

Bloody Bones by Laurell K. Hamilton. 10 CDs at 12.5 hours. More vampire and werewolf sex I suppose.

Small Wars by Sadie Jones. 8 CDs at 10.5 hours. British Army officer and family go to Cyprus in 1956. Officer is in combat and things change between he and his wife.


City of Lost Girls by Declan Hughes. I cannot keep the Declans (Burke and Hughes) apart.

The Blackout by Martha Grimes. Something about a person who has a blackout. Maybe they have a memory blackout during an electrical blackout while playing in a minstrel show wearing blackface.

You know what I want to read about? An overweight, middle-aged woman assassin. They could hold some promise.

Changes by Jim Butcher. You know what I don't want to read about? Witches in Chicago.

Imperfect Birds by Anne Lamott. Judging by the cover illustration and typeface this is something "literary".

The Aloha Quilt by Jennifer Chiaverini. Chiaverini continues to steamroll the quilting universe and become the empress of Quilting Fiction.


Mike and Mike's Rules for Sports and Life by Mike Greenberg and Mike Golic. Golic is the fat one. Greenberg is the one using hair products.

The Rough Guide First-Time Asia by Lesley Reader. I ran across a web page devoted to middle-aged white guys who travel to Thailand for hookers. It was creepy, depressing, and fascinating all at once.

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

Sixteen Novels with Critiques of Author Photos.


Expiration Date by Duane Swierczynski. Unemployed reporter Mickey moves into his sick grandfather's place. The next day he wakes up and everything is the same: cars, the elevated train, the same stores. But, Mickey has woken up in the past, and has met the 12-year-old kid who will murder Mickey's father. Crappy little postage stamp black-and-white author photo.

Exclusive by Fern Michaels. Author photo has Michaels sitting on a couch with three dogs and trying to smile.

Nowhere to Run by C.J. Box. Another novel in Box's Wyoming game warden series with Joe Pickett. Box is supposed to write great, exciting novels but I have not read one yet. I suppose I could start with this one. Box was at Murder and Mayhem in Muskego and never took off his hat. He left it on for his author photo too.

A River in the Sky by Elizabeth Peters. Amelia Peabody is banned from the Valley of the Kings and takes a trip to Palestine with another archaeologist. Amelia's arch. partner wants to find the Ark of the Covenant. Peters is posing with a hat for her photo has it lying (laying?) next to her and is posing in an Egyptian ruins settings. Peters has a different author photo than I remember from before. I think she used to pose wearing a Pith helmet.

Laughed 'Til He Died by Carolyn Hart. "A Death on Demand Mystery". Hart's author photo is fairly straightforward studio snap.

The Telling by Beverly Lewis. Lewis also has a studio snap but it has that blurry-hazy look added to it.

The Last Time I Saw You by Elizabeth Berg. Another studio snap but with black-and-white and more contrast.

Holly Blues by Susan Wittig Albert. Another studio snap but with one of those weird poses where Wittig is holding her hand up under her chin.

The Killing Edge by Heather Graham. Full color author photo on the back cover that is more of a glamour shot with graham's hair down and arranged and big earrings.

Cat of the Century by Rita Mae Brown. Brown does not have an author photo. She has a picture of a green eyed cat on the back cover.

Blame by Michelle Huneven. Another studio shot with good lighting. I like this shot the best.

Large Print With No Author Photos

Think Twice by Lisa Scottoline.

Shattered by Karen Robards.

The Sheen on the Silk by Anne Perry.

Caught by Harlan Coben.

The Silent Sea by Clive Cussler.

Tuesday, April 06, 2010

Some DVDs and Reed Farrel Coleman


Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog starring Neil Patrick Harris and Nathan Fillion. Because some people don't want to watch the damn thing on the computer. With a bunch of "bonus material".

The Blind Side starring Sandra Bullock, Some Tall Kid. Instead of playing a hooker-with-a-heart-of-gold or a nun Bullock plays a nice, rich, white lady and gets an Oscar.

The Men Who Stare at Goats with Obi Wan Kenobi, Robert Patrick, Mr. Hollywood. Army study to use brainwaves to kill goats and Iranians. Or something. A comedy.

Doc Martin, Series [season] 3 with Martin Clunes. Former surgeon with blood phobia continues to be brusque and evasive in small town England.

New Moon starring [current teen sensations]. Girl loves vampire and werewolf. Or something. I'm not going to watch this crap.


Tower by Ken Bruen and Reed Farrel Coleman. Crime novel.

Monday, April 05, 2010

NonFiction Part Two: Cookbooks

NonFiction Part Two - Cookbooks

Taste of Home Comfort Food Diet Cookbook by Taste of Home Books.

Salt: cooking with the world's favorite seasoning by Valerie Aikman-Smith.

Muffin Magic: irresistible recipes for [something covered by the barcode] by Susannah Blake.

Taste of Home Dinner on a Dime by Taste of Home Magazine. 403 budget-friendly family recipes.

Preserving: self-sufficiency by Carol Wilson. "Preserving fruits and vegetables is a great way to turn homegrown or local produce into delicious treats that can be enjoyed year-round."

Mad Hungry: feeding men and boys, recipes, strategies and survival techniques by Lucinda Scala Quinn.

Taste of Home Comfort Food Diet Cookbook by Taste of Home Magazine.

Best of Taste of Home, Volume 2.

Super Salads: More than 250 super-easy recipes for super nutrition and super flavor.

Betty Crocker Money Saving Meals: 200 delicious ways to eat on the cheap.

Good Home Cookbook: more than 1,000 classic American recipes edited by Richard J. Perry.

More Vegetables Please!: over 100 easy and delicious recipes for eating healthy foods each and every day by Elson M. Haas, MD and Patty James, MS.

NonFiction Part One: Comic book novels, test guides, bicycles, hippie stuff

NonFiction - Part One

Baby Sleep Guide: sleep solutions for you and your baby by Marcie Jones and Sandy Jones. Good luck with that.

Bluegrass: a true story of murder in Kentucky by William Van Meter. Student murdered in her dorm room in Western Kentucky University.

The Golden Age of Handbuilt Bicycles: craftsmanship, elegance and function by Jan Heine, Jean-Pierre Praderes. Cycling is popular around here. I took a chance on this one even though it cost $50. Lots of nice photos.

Islands of Hell: the U.S. Marines in the Western Pacific, 1944-1945 by Eric Hammel. Since The Pacific is on HBO I figured this may go out. That and I like the coffee table books on WWII. Especially the Pacific campaign. When I worked in the Stacks at the U of I I ran across a multi-volume photo history of the Pacific campaign. Island after island after island of barren beaches surrounding swamp and mangrove forests and quickly filling up with piles of garbage, cardboard boxes, brass casings, and tin cans.

Naturopathic Way: how to detox, find quality nutrition, and restore your acid-alkaline balance by Christopher Vasey, N.D.

The Story of Libraries: from the inception of writing to the computer age by Fred Lerner.

2010 Writer's Market, 89th annual edition.

2010 Guide to Literary Agents, 19th annual edition by [some editor]. If the Writer's Market works.

Complete Guide to Prescription and Nonprescription Drugs, 2010 edition by E. Winter Griffith, M.D. The Griffith name has a trademark mark next to it. Why not just take his name off and promote the real guy's name to the top?

2010 Standard Catalog of Baseball Cards, 19th edition edited by Don Fluckinger. Fluckinger?

Windows 7 Secrets by Paul Thurrott and Rafael Rivera. We need newer computer books.

Praxis, 10th edition. Practice exams for the PRAXIS test - whatever the hell that is.

5 GED Practice Tests by Princeton Review. I only "studied" the night before my GED exams. I then woke up late, scrabbled for a couple pencils and then drove over to south central Dallas to take the exam.

Gotham Central: Book Two: Jokers and Madmen by Ed Brubaker and Greg Rucka. We have the first one in the series and it has gone out 13 times.

Pinocchio: Vampire Slayer by Van Jensen and Dusty Higgins. Comic book novel with Pinocchio using his growing nose to make stakes and revenge Geppetto.

Raise Happy Chickens and Other Poultry by Victoria Roberts. Broody hens, handling ducks, plucking and hanging, favorite recipes.

Cleveland Clinic Guide to Menopause: everything you need to know to thrive during menopause, from a renowned women's health expert by Holly Thacker, MD. Thacker?

The No Bull Book on Heart Disease: real answers to winning back your heart and health by Joel Okner MD and Jeremy Clorfene, PhD.

The Ultimate Guide to Trail Running by Adam W. Chase and Nancy Hobbs. Equipment, finding trails, weather, hill strategy, so on, so forth.

The Truth About Back Pain: a revolutionary approach to diagnosing and healing back pain by Todd Sinett, DC and Sheldon Sinett, DC.

Living with Someone Who's Living with BiPolar Disorder: a practical guide for family, friends, and coworkers by Chelsea Lowe and Bruce M Cohen, MD, PhD.

The Brain Training Revolution: a proven workout for healthy brain aging by Paul E. Bendheim, MD. Brains science, exercises, look at that duck, lifestyle adjustments.